It’s a case study of 7 year old boy who was overdependent on his parents. How he got gradually transformed to be a very confident and independent child once his parents realised what exactly is causing his dependency and how it is also lowering his self confidence over the period of time. ‘
Before En-Reach Program:
Over Dependency and overprotection
Shubham was a boy of age seven. All was well except his dependency on parents, even for the smallest thing. It began in the morning; the parents helped Shubham brush his teeth; push him into taking a bath and everything else too. His parents quoted, Shubham was ‘sluggish and lazy’. Everything had to be spoon fed. Even after Shubham was ready for school, he had to be dropped off near the bus stop, as his parents used to worry about his road safety. He was of course, also received near the bus after coming back from school.
Things were no different with Shubham’s homework. His mom used to check the school diary daily, make him study and do the homework, assisting him even with minor things.
During En-Reach Program:
Gradual Transformation in thoughts and actions
By closely monitoring and analysing Shubham’s daily behavior, En-Reach helped his parents see the situation- how it would prove to be a greater issue in the near future, if not dealt with at that time. Things didn’t improve all of a sudden, but they did so, every step of the way.
Shubham’s parents realised their anxieties about him and decided to let go (but in systematic En-Reach way). They allowed Shubham to do things on his own, which boosted his self confidence greatly.
After En-Reach Program:
Responsible, Independent and Confident Shubham
As mentioned above, after the eye-opening En-Reach workshop, Shubham’s parents let Shubham do things on his own.
Shubham’s mom especially, gave up a huge chunk of control on him, making him take ownership of his actions. It started with the daily activities. Shubham started getting ready on his own. When he did not finish said activities on his own, he would face consequences at school.
Understandably, the parents weren’t happiest during this transition stage, as initially, Shubham faced numerous difficulties. Many a times, he did not finish his after-school studies, like homework and assignments. The parents were blamed for not paying enough attention to their kid. Teachers, relatives and other peers considered this to be an ill form of conduct upon the child, especially when Shubham’s grades collapsed as a matter of not studying well.
Even so, the parents didn’t budge; their ulterior motive was being achieved. Shubham gradually, realised that his parents were always going to be supportive of him, but what he has to do, he has to do it.
This ‘responsibility transfer’ helped Shubham a great deal. In a year’s duration, Shubham owned up to his actions. Things started running on a smooth track. He woke up with the help of an alarm, got ready for school, boarded the bus and did his daily homework, all by his own!
A major shift in Shubham’s personality development was seen. As he grew accustomed to doing things on his own, he realised they weren’t a big deal at all. This helped him shift focus onto other things and activities. He started expressing desires to do newer activities with his parents.
In this way, Shubham’s talents found their way. Now, he is known for his singing talent. On the sports front, he was an instant hit in slow cycling. Confidence accompanied him every step of the way and this was visible in the way he fearlessly conversed with teachers, friends, relatives and parents.
Today, the mornings in Shubham’s house are quarrel-free and joyful. Shubham throws no tantrums and finishes every activity in the time he is supposed to. A year filled with challenges surely proved to be of help in Shubham’s and his parents’ life.
The parents find it much easier today to raise Shubham. Earlier, Shubham used to secure 80% to 90% marks in exams but almost 70-80% of it reflected Shubham’s mom’s efforts. During the responsibility transfer, Shubham sunk as low as ‘just passed’ or received 60-70%. Later, as he gained momentum, he rose to 75%, 80% and 85%. Today, whatever Shubham scores, it is all his own effort poured into studying and writing exams, with no intervention of his parents. He even scored 90% marks in his exams and made his family proud. Shubham has truly become independent. In the near future, if Shubham opts to go to a different place to study, he won’t face multiple problems.
Shubham took more than a year to fully match up to his earlier grades but today, he shines like a new penny. A new Shubham- confident, responsible and happy has emerged!
child development, confident, discipline, focus, parenting, schools, self-discipline, single parenting